Thursday 13 February 2014

Understanding Husbands - A Rare Species

"Understanding husbands", that rarest of rare species which is supposed to listen to his wife and wife's paternal family, and also listen to his own parents and still balance both with elan. Why is it that most husbands fall in two major categories: (a) inclined towards wife or (b) inclined towards parents?
Why the middle category of Understanding Husbands is a rarest of rare category?

Here is the reason.
It is much easier to take sides than be neutral. Let us take a simple (seemingly hypothetical) case study.

It is 02nd of October, Saturday. Husband has a holiday. Next day is Sunday. So two back to back holidays.
Wife: Let us go to my parent's place as my parents have planned a trip to Haridwar.
Mother (of Husband): Let us go to Agra togethar. We have never visited that place together.

Now how would husbands react? The easy path is taken by two types of husbands.

The husbands inclined to wives would go with wife and neglect the parent's diktat. It is obviously easier to quell fight at one place than both.

The husbands inclined to parents would simply say a no to wife's proposal. Again it is easier to quell the wife's voice.

99% of husbands fall in the above two categories, at least till his parents are alive.

it is the 1% husbands who stand out for being neutral. And the problem is he can't decide what to do? He can neither upset his wife nor his parents because they both are valid at their points. So now what? A stalemate condition. It is this situation which is the most difficult thing to handle. And that is why most husbands choose sides rather than remaining neutral.

There can be quite a few possibilities that the neutral husbands can take. Either he decides against going in either of places. Justice done to both sides. Problem is he will be battered by both sides. Wife and Mother both will batter him.

Other possibility is to postpone one trip to next week but then he will be battered again as egos tend to flare up when in-laws are concerned. So that creates further problems.

The above is a simple example that I have quoted. there are much more complex situations where te neutral husbands are always at the receiveing ends from both sides. hence husbands donot like being neutral coz that is too much to ask for. Hence they take sides and therefore UNDERSTANDING HUSBANDS hardly exist. 

1 comment:

Unknown said...

And what, if the husband has already planned something 4 himself?
doesn't he has any wish?
Y don't d wife and d mother ask him,"What u wanna do in these 2 days?"
Y dis never happens???